Friday, October 22, 2010

Stuck On Stupid

I clearly understand the expression "scared stiff"... I have experienced it a few times...


I've been scared stiff for a couple of days and stuck on stupid.


This morning I woke up and... I don't know... I can't tell you what it is inside of me... because I don't know what it is... 


I just felt good and felt like everything's going to be alright.


It was raining and drippy dreary and super cold, but through my eyes, it was a beautiful morning. The world lays before me... yeah maybe I've lost my mind.


As I made some coffee I put in a call to Blob-Employ to have them put me on the call list for this weekend. Oh, I hope they call... 


I've gotten emails from Gina. She wants me to return to work. Her whole problem is that she can't pay me more than minimum wage. ( Seriously should have told me that on day one...) I told her that I'd have to think about it. Yes, I know.... but work is work, and money is money, and it might be okay just going in there a few hours in the early morning and then going to work somewhere else afterward... At least I have been assured that she IS going to pay me. 


I got some referrals for good lawyers that deal with on-the-job harassment and discrimination. Only waiting to call because I was short on minutes on my phone. All I really want from that is my three weeks pay from February when I was wrongfully suspended. I believe that by law I am entitled to that pay. We will see. Washington state employment laws are pretty wonky.  


I also have forms on the desk to fill out for the Department of Child Support... it won't help me right away but it's a start I guess.


Wally and I made a trip out to go to the bank where I deposited 98 cents and got the rest back in cash. We had to go down and pay the car payment... at least I could pay that! 


Really I had to giggle about my bank deposit... well? At least I have a bank account still... haha!! Well, 98 cents is better than a negative balance.. haha!! Well actually I'm carrying a balance of MORE than 98 cents, not much more, but still, haha!!


Then we made a trip to the grocery store... can't spend more than 20 bucks... hmm... let's see... 


It was our lucky day. We found chicken breasts for 97 cents a pound. We went to look at fresh veggies, but all we can do is "look" at those anymore. (one reason why we frequent the Chinese market, the veggies are fresh and cheaper) Seriously, there is SOMETHING really wrong when fresh raw broccoli costs twice as much as your meat... So we went to look on the canned veggie aisle... 69 cents a can for corn... basically a can of salty water but whatever.. that works for now...


I don't know what will happen about my lack of paying rent... or our eviction... I just hope I have enough time to work and get some money together to find a place to go and keep a roof over our heads... 


All I know is I can't worry a whole lot about it, because I'll get scared, get stupid, and I'll stop... and I can't do that. 


I have to keep on going.  

2 comments:

  1. You can apply for food stamps. I just read an article that if you live in Hawaii you can make $59,000 a year and still get food stamps or whatever it is called these days. I am glad she called to you come back. Make sure she pays you what she owes you before you do work for her again.

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  2. @ Connie - I'm already getting food stamps for the first time in my life...it's called EBT now... since I am working I only qualify for 160 a month. Since I just quit a job I won't qualify at all for any more.

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