Being Home

Since I've been home this past week in the mornings (instead of working) I've been hearing Danielle getting up to get ready for school. 


There is no loud alarm. She just gets up quietly. She puts on coffee. Then she spends about an hour in the bathroom applying war-paint and making herself smell good. She makes herself a bowl of cereal and drinks a cup of coffee and then heads out to catch her bus. 


Just like a tree falling in the forest... this happens whether I am home to hear it or not. 


She has always been like this... 


She gets herself off to school... She has never lost a house key. She actually GOES to school. She looks great. She's alway clean. She works hard in school... she has to work at it... it does not come as easy for her as it does for some people. She gets excellent grades. She's very responsible. 


Over the past few years I have gotten to know her better and our relationship has greatly improved because of it. She is pretty open with me now... and still... anything that she doesn't feel that comfortable coming to me with, she will go to Wally about, knowing that it WILL get back to me...


Because of her daily actions, I do not view her as a drug addict, or as promiscuous, or as a person needing psychiatric "help".... 


I view her as an above average teenager and I am quite proud to be her Mom. 


With that much said.... 


Yes... she has made some bad choices, some mistakes.... mistakes that she is still paying the price for.


I'm not going to blame others for her choices.... but I will say that I am seeing too many similarities to Dani's high school years here and Tony's. I am hearing Dani say now what Tony said a few years ago. 


I also know that my own problems that I've been having here ( in the workplace and with "friends") are not so different than the problems my kids have been facing.


It's giving me a lot to think about.